Friday, October 9, 2009

Dear Jon & Kate Gosselin

Letters of Intent

Ah Friday! Time for another Letter of Intent. Oh Julie, what a great idea! Be sure you check out all of the other Letter's of Intent. You're gonna love it!

Dear Jon & Kate Gosselin,
It has come to my attention, and that of EVERYONE ELSE, that you are going through an ugly divorce. I'd like to take this opportunity to address said ugly divorce.
Now you may not feel it's any of my business to address however, you have made it EVERYONE ELSE'S business so deal with it.
Jon, no matter what some younger women may be whispering in your ear, you are not God's gift to women. The youthful clothing, the earings in your ears and the cavorting around the Planet with much younger women just makes you look like an idiot. You are still a middle age man with many children and a gut you can't hide under clothing better suited to teenagers. Grow up.
Your countless television, radio and magazine interviews are beyond old. Shut the hell up. Yes Kate was a bitch to you during your marriage. No she shouldn't have treated you the way she did but honestly, do you really think you are any better? Have you never heard the "Sticks and stones" and "Glass houses" sayings? Cause if you haven't, I would be happy to fill you in!
If you truly did take $200,000 out of a joint checking account, put it back. DUH?! Idiot.
Kate, let's be honest here. You were a bitch to Jon. You were. You should not speak to your spouse the way you spoke to Jon. No, that's no reason for Jon to completely wig out the way he did but still. What goes around comes around. You send bitchiness out, you may just end up with a whole lot of bitchiness back in your lap.
You tearfully said Monday morning on the Today show that you never wanted to air your dirty laundry in public but Jon has left you no choice. Yeah. Sure. Maybe you'd like to get back on the air and see if you could sell some prime beach front property in Arizona too? Because if you were serious, you would have continued to let your legal team handle it and KEPT IT TO YOURSELF.
And can we please, for one moment, discuss having $210,000 IN A CHECKING ACCOUNT?! Who has that kind of money in ANY account let alone a joint checking account?! You seriously have bills so large that you need that kind of jing in a Bank account?! I think it's time to take a good hard look at how you're livin' girlie. And no one bought the "I will work at McDonald's if I have to so I can take care of my kids" ploy. Please. Aren't you a nurse? Isn't there a large demand for Nurses right now? McDonald's? You seriously "jumped the shark" on that one honey.
And finally, you two are not the only ones walking the planet that ever went through a nasty divorce. I myself, have been through a nasty divorce. Hey Kate, my ex hasn't paid child support in nearly two years and he thinks it's totally ok to let BSP pay for and raise his daughters. You don't see me on the Today show or any other National media outlet bitching about it, do you?
So both of you, shut up! Go take care of the many, many children you have running around. Who, by the way, got you where you are in the first place!
Get off of my TV, get out of every single magazine in the supermarket.Ok kids? Now go play nice.
But do please GO.


Michelle Hoad said...

Amen said...

Good one!!!!!

Lisa said...

well said!

julie said...

YES!!! I don't know of anyone out there who feels differently... how have the TV shows and magazines not yet figured out that we're all over it??? Great letter!

Foursons said...

Oh hell ya. Sorry. I shouldn't cuss on someone else's blog. But yes! You have said it and said it well my friend. This train wreck is turning horribly, horribly wrong. And those poor kids...big $ for therapy is in their future.

Thanks for linking up- your letter is right on the money! (Literally.)

TheRixonFive said...

yes. yes. yes!!

Brandi said...

Amen, sista! ;) Every time I see Jon on TV, I'm like eeeew, he is seriously no prize. He looks ridiculous.

Just Stacy said...

I confess I used to have a crush on Jon and I always thought Kate was a beotch, but he's an ass now and she's still a bitch. A sad bitch. Great letter.

Anonymous said...

It could not have been stated any better...girlfriend-you got skills!! We all know everyone agrees...but apparently the magazines etc are still selling!?! I personally NEVER did like the show...couldn't stand either one of them!!

Love ya! (((hugs)))

Stone Fox said...

i am left wondering if i have a second personality who has her own blog and writes *kick ass* letters to celebrities.

do you mind if i borrow and/or steal this celebrity letter writing idea for letters of intent friday sometime?

Kmama said...


Jewelz said...

Teehee...I must be the ONLY person reading your letter that had to 'google' Jon and Kate Gosselin LMAO....sometimes I feel like I miss out on so much, when I read about adventures that happen far from my shores :0) In this case...I'm glad Australian Television hasn't gotten on the Gosselin Train !!! EEp...I just read Julie from Foursons comment! I'm laughin out loud...Julie mention's 'train wreck'...and I unwittingly support her comment by being glad our media isn't on the 'Gosselin Train' ha too funny :0) ~ is it the 'Julie connection LOL :0)'

Thanks for sharing.