Oh yeah baby! It's Friday and you know what that means! Letters of Intent! You know the drill. Shake your tail feather and head over to Julie's and read 'em all!
Dear BRAVO T.V. Network,
I've been dying to address a few issues with you and I feel this is the best way to do just that.
First let me say, I really do enjoy Top Chef and Project Runway. While they are not on my list of "must watch" TV, if I spy a re-run, I will watch. Not that I could ever prepare any of the food I have ever seen on Top Chef or could I ever create any type of clothing with no pattern and simply rely on my brain power. God didn't Bless me with that gift, sad to say.
My concern lies directly in the "Real Housewives" shows. You know the ones I'm talking about...Real Housewives of Atlanta, New Jersey, etc...
There's NOTHING "real housewife" about any of these crazy beotches. NOTHING. Honestly, what made you think "Hey! Here's a rockin' idea! Let's try to find the craziest, fake, rich, bored, catty women and give them a TV show called Real Housewives". I dare say you are all just as clueless as the women you call housewives.
I, on the other hand, am very real. All of the gals out here in Blog world are very real. Let me just take you through a quick walk of "real" vs "fake".
My boobs, after having nursed three babies, are really not even qualified to be called boobs anymore. Trust me, you don't want to see these pups out any where. I don't even make BSP suffer through this mess! <-----Real....the boobies on those "other" ladies? Lordy, that's a ton of saline and silicone! <-------Fake
My children grew up with me. Yep. I raised 'em. No nanny. No help. Me. Trust me, there were many, many times when the vomit, snotty noses, poopy diapers, sleepless nights, squables among sibblings, cranky "oh my God if you do that one more time I am going to wet your lips and stick you to a wall" children really made me want to go running through the streets screaming, I didn't. I stuck it out. <--------Real
"Their" children...nannies and full time help. Bratty, yes. Spoiled, yes but all done by someone else. I daresay if any of those kids even dreamed of up-chucking on one of those plastic chicks, a WHOLE EPISODE would be done around the hysteria of said plastic chick over being barfed on.<----Fake
I have to work. For someone else. Money doesn't grow on trees and bless BSP's heart, he would let me stay home if we could afford it but we can't. Most mommies have to do both and for the mommies who stay home with their kiddos, those families are sacrificing in order to have the mama stay home. We do without. A lot. There are very few luxuries we can afford because all of our hard earned money goes to bills, housepayments and our "always needing something" children. <------Real
"They" have nothing better to do with their days other than sit around a pool, gossip, "do lunch" have catfights with each other and drink each and every day.<----------Fake
And speaking of money, has it escaped your notice that we are in a recession? People all over are losing their homes, struggling to feed their children and simply survive and yet you have the gall to put these shows on?! What is the matter with you?! Here's a thought...how about you take the resources you are pouring in to the awful plastic people you mistakenly call "real" and take a look at the real world and real lives? And no, Jon and Kate Gosselin and The Duggars don't count. Don't even get me started on that mess!
So, until you wake up and "clue in" to the real lives, real struggles of real people, I refuse to watch. I will NEVER watch. If it were up to me, NO ONE would watch.
And "ladies" (yes, I use that term very loosly) those of you who star in these shows...PPUULLLEEAAASSSSEEE! Grow up, get a clue, and go away. Plastic Freaks.